11/08/08 Freebies

Do you ever feel, as a parent, like you're just not in control of your kids? Good Golly! I'll tell ya what~ my 5 yr. old son is really on one lately, and when I say 'lately,' I mean, for over the last 4 or 5 weeks!

The boy just will not obey us! He will not listen, playing like he can't hear us, and he's hitting....everyone! There have been no new changes in his surroundings, and Dad hasn't been going out of town for a couple of months now, and I'm getting fed up!

I consider my husband and I to be on top of things, as parents, and we know that threatening doesn't do anyone any good. We also know we're not perfect, and that we, too have room for improvement, so don't get me wrong there...

BUT~ as far as my son goes... we've put him in more time-outs than I can count, we've taken away privileges, and we've even *smothered* him in love, in case it's all just him feeling the opposite.



Linda Walton aka bobbysgirlforever said...

Hi Amie! You SWEET girl you! Thank you for listing my goodies and I am not one who ever GIVES advice - I just like to SHARE from my experiences.

While I NEVER experienced this type of behavior with any of my six at an early age, I did so with one of the twins when he was nine. Without going into detail, I will just say this, NORMALLY (not always, but most of the time) when a young child is acting out in a way he normally does not, such as "hitting", they are typically acting out due to some sort of stressor. If I only knew what I know now, I would have seen his cry for help in a VERY traumatic situation. I am not saying that your son is necessarily experiencing anything traumatic, but there is always that possibility.

Parenting is DEFINTELY an ongoing education!

Your son is five - is he in school? Any peers that might be threatening him in some way? An adult perhaps?

I shall be thinking of you and I hope that you are able to pinpoint the source of his recent change in behavior. Granted, children do go through stages, but if this has been going on for WEEKS, it just might be a signal to a "negative" in his life that he is not able to express any other way.

Linda :)

Amie said...

LINDA!!! Yay~ thank you for responding!

You've given me much to think about, and new eyes to observe with. And as you've said that his behavior may be his way of a cry for help to a very traumatic situation...

He seems to actually be very comfortable at school, and thus has become a bit...not unruly, but more inattentive and more verbal when he should be quiet.

I understand that it may not seem traumatic to ME, but to HIM, in his world of childhood struggles and hardships he faces everyday, it could be monumental!

Seriously, you've helped me re-focus, and to be more vigilant in trying to understand him and what may be going on in his life and inside his mind.

Thank you so much for sharing Linda!